Living Together Before Marriage
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
, Posted by Sandra Chat at 2:54 PM
Living together before marriage has become a norm in our society today. Couples move in together without thinking twice. Some believe moving in together before marriage will help determine whether the two are right for each other. Others think it will bring them closer while the majority are certain it will allow them two save money in preparation for their future. I believe these all are excuses used by individual who are afraid to commit. Playing "house" goes against God's plan for our lives. Call me old fashioned, this is simply my opinion.
1. If you're not sure whether or not you and your partner are right for each other then moving in together should be the last thing on your mind. Why would you want to move in with someone you don't feel you know well enough? Let me fill you in on a little secret; you'll never stop learning about your partner. You can be together for twenty years and still discover something new. What are you going to do after finding out you're not compatible? Move out and move in with the next person you decide to date? Some may say at least they uncovered the truth before it was too late. I say it was a lot of money and time spent wasted and they probably would have discovered this anyway.
2. For those who want to get closer to their mate, understand it takes time. Although moving in together will allow you to be around each other more and even give you a better idea of what it would be like if the two of you were to be married; nothing compares to the real thing. When you're single and live together, you always have the option to walk out if something goes wrong because legally, you're not obligated to stay with this person and its easier to walk away from a situation than to deal with it. Closeness develops through tough times and struggles. When you get deathly ill, will your partner be there to take care of you? If you lose your six figure income job, will your partner stand by you and hold it down until you're back on your feet? If you really want to get close, these are the things you should be watching out for.
3. Moving in together to save money is the biggest excuse of them all. I used to think after getting married, I'd save so much more money because there would now be double the income and I'd be able to split the bills. Boy was I wrong. What I failed to consider was how much everything else would increase. (i.e electricity, heat, water, groceries, laundry etc.) I'm not saying that you wouldn't save at all, perhaps if the two of you budget right, you may do all right. However, my experiences have proven otherwise. I was able to save so much more when I was dating and living alone than I do now that I'm married.
My advice is, enjoy being single as long as you can. (You're still considered single if you're not married). After all, you have the rest of your life to live together and get to know one another. THE REST OF YOUR LIFE (at least that's the intention). Why would you want to be in a rush to give up your privacy, freedom and space? Most importantly, its not aligned with God's plan for us.
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